Unwelcome Visitors are Crossing My Borders

There are increasing numbers of unwelcome visitors crossing into my territory. They come uninvited without regard to our rules. They reap the benefits of the bounty intended for others without earning the privilege.

I promise you that putting up fences at my southern border will not deter this relentless influx. I've even tried shooting a few of them but still they come. I could set up a needlessly bureaucratic and inefficient process to document them but that would only invite lawlessness. I suppose it would be possible for me to document their presence in an efficient way and appreciate their value. Perhaps this would be the key to addressing the true root cause of an immigration issue.

Meanwhile, the unwelcome visitors pour into my territory. Darn those squirrels.

The Sincerest, Humblest Apology of 1/8/2008

I goofed up. I made a mistake.

While writing my column on Obama in Iowa, I hadn't decided how I was going to word Rev. Jesse Jackson winning primaries during his Presidential bids, so I skipped the parts where I'd refer to Jackson and wrote everything else.

The problem is that the version I completed, which acknowledges Jackson's accomplishments, was not the one I happened to turn in. In essence, I turned in an incomplete draft.

I turned the column in Friday morning but did not realize the blunder until late Friday evening, when it was too late to switch the stories. I agonized over it all weekend and hoped that I would be able to make changes before it ran, but when I saw in Sunday's paper that it was running Monday, I gave up hope.

I have no problems admitting that I made a mistake and that I’ll make a few more before it’s all said and done.

My biggest regret is that some people take everything that's written in the paper, or said on the news as the ultimate truth. I know that Obama wasn't the first person of color to win a primary, the fact that I know isn't that important. What's important is making sure the people who read my pieces aren't mislead or given inaccurate information.

I stand by my opinions, but I form those on truths and those are the same truths I aim to share with the people who read what I write.

I take full responsibility for my actions and I look at this as a learning experience. I hope that this reminds people that "the media" isn't always 100% accurate but we (I guess it's we and not they) are 100% human. Well, maybe most of us, I think a number of people would dispute Bill O’Reilly, Rush Limbaugh or Pat Robertson being human but for the sake of this argument, let’s assume they’re people.

~Katrina L. Rogers

Nothing but curveballs

Roger Clemens tried to convince America that he had never used steroids. He didn’t throw us any fastballs for strikes, but he did throw us curve balls – some in the dirt and others that were hanging there waiting for us to hit out of the park.

The “Rocket” says he would have been pulling a tractor with his teeth if he had used illegal substances. That would make some kind of sense if Clemens took part in extreme sports and performed as a professional tractor puller. But Roger was a baseball pitcher, and we all know there is no tractor pulling, or crying, in baseball. However, baseball does have a place for players that throw rocket-fast fastballs. Hmmm?

Let’s see, Roger is still known as the “Rocket” at 45. His explanation for that is that he worked out and 60 Minutes showed him doing crunches. Gee, even I could have done that workout if my trainer was rocking me back and forth like he did Clemens.

Clemens also said if he had taken steroids he would have a 3rd ear growing out of his head. That’s odd, I’ve never heard or read anywhere of that being a symptom of someone on steroids. However I have heard of “roid rage” as a symptom. Remember that unforgettable and otherwise unexplainable broken bat-throwing incident in the World Series. Clemens picked up the jagged spear like broken bat and threw it at the base runner. That’s dang near a 3rd ear in my book.

Clemens said he did receive injections for elbow and arm pain. When I received injections for pain in my joints, those injections were given locally, in the joints not in the buttocks.

Sorry, Roger, you didn’t convince me. You are going to have to do a lot more than what you did on 60 Minutes. You have to come up with more convincing arguments than what you have given so far. You need to get in front of Congress and answer all of their questions with out qualification. And please don’t insult their intelligence like you did ours.

Standardized Parts

Any discussion of American engineering and manufacturing genius includes Eli Whitney and Henry Ford. Both borrowed and applied the concept of interchangeable parts, Whitney to produce firearms and Ford to produce vehicles using the assembly line. In doing so they increased production, while lowering the cost of production. That led to easily repairable products that increased the practical lifetimes of their products. In short standardized parts benefited both producers and consumers.

After my holiday shopping experiences and cooking mishaps, it is time to standardize some things for the benefit of the American consumer. The first item they need to standardize is the card reader at the check out stands. Some customers swipe their cards backwards, other upside down, while others use the wrong side. The confusion is understandable, since every store has a different machine and procedure, and some stores with multiple area outlets do it differently in each store. Waiting in the checkout line, the person in front of you invariably asks which way to insert the card. Those lines could be considerably faster if every shopper did not have to ask, and every checker did not have to explain, the correct card orientation before inserting or swiping it.

The second required standardization is for caps on foods. For instance salad dressing, some bottles have a small squirt spout on the top and others have just the inch to inch and one-half opening on top. If you forget to check you might just end up with a cup of dressing instead of the tablespoon you had intended. Open one bottle of spice and it delivers a sprinkle. Open another brand and it opens in the pour mode. Spices must always have a sprinkle option first, so that people like me don’t pour a bottle of onion powder into the recipe that calls for a sprinkle.

Surely the producers can come up with a standardized way of doing things that would make it more convenient for the consumer and not just for the producer? Surely the corporate bean counters see the financial wisdom of not paying a group of people in their research and development departments to reinvent the wheel. And speaking of wheels, is it too much to ask automakers use the same size gas caps and radiator caps in all vehicles?